The Friday Shop

The Friday Shop by Wardrobe Oxygen

Am I the only one looking at her big wallet from 2019 and finding it utterly ridiculous? Like, really, why did I carry around all those cards? All that weight? Since the pandemic started, I've been using my Dagne Dover card case as a wallet, but am finding as the world has opened up, it's too small. While it is still my go-to for nights out and travel, I need something that's still small enough to tuck into my belt bag and smaller purses (or even a jacket pocket) but big enough to hold more than two cards and a single dollar bill.

best womens wallets 2021

camel and pink | blue croco | leopard with stripe | metallic diagonal stripes | red | green | pale aqua zipper | yellow | dark snakeskin | blue snakeskin | green and blue print | silver

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I am hard on my wallets, and I've learned a non-black wallet and one with some texture or hardware makes it easier to find at the bottom of a bag. The blue croco from Brahmin is my current frontrunner because my old heavy wallet is Brahmin (this style) and it has held up beautifully for years. While I don't love the color choices, the red one from Hobo is second because I also have had a lot of success with Hobo wallets. The blue and green Salvatore Ferragamo is totally out of my pricerange, but it was too pretty not to include in the collage!

Sale Alert

equilibria

Through the end of the month, Equilibria CBD is offering 20% off subscriptions for months 1-3. Usually, if you use my promo code, you can get 15% off a new subscription for the first month. But this deal it's up to 20%, it's for THREE months but even better… EXISTING CUSTOMERS CAN USE THIS PROMO CODE! This is a different code from what I've shared before: use wardrobeoxygenfall20 to get 20% off subscriptions for new and existing customers.

I KNOW Equilibria usually only has discounts for new customers so I had to share this. Subscriptions can be on boxes of items that work well together (and that is already at a discount from shopping individually), but subscriptions can be for individual product as well. For example, my husband's friend is subscribed to the Relief Balm. As a runner, he uses it on his knees and feet and likes getting a new jar each month so he doesn't ever go without. My cousin subscribes to just the softgels, which she takes after dinner to help her stay asleep at night.

equilibria promo code
A graphic from Equilibria that better explains this deal through September 30th.

Subscriptions can be hella sketchy with lots of strings attached but Equilibria makes it super easy to change, pause, and cancel a subscription. Not trying to throw my mom under the bus but if she was able to do it without any stress, it shows how they care more about you being happy than them getting another month out of you.

I swear by Equilibria's Relief Balm, but I use their softgels, drops, melts, and gummies. Karl loves their bath soak, softgels, and Relief Balm. My daughter even uses the Relief Balm for cramps, mosquito bites, and put it on her feet after a long hike. For more information, read my skeptical Equilibria CBD review.

Necessaire promo code

Y'all know by now that I am obsessed with the body care brand Nécessaire. Amazing ingredients, great ethics, and the products really work for me and my family. I use the body wash, body lotion, and body serum daily. My daughter also uses the body lotion and loves their new shampoo and conditioner. My husband likes the body wash and exfoliator. The unscented is truly unscented; no weird plastic or chemical smell. The scents are natural; we love the Eucalyptus and Sandalwood though the Bergamot has also been enjoyed.

Well right now with every Nécessaire purchase you get a bottle of their Body Serum for free. This is an amazing deal; the serum absorbs beautifully for silky hydrated skin. You can use it alone or with body lotion (theirs or another brand). Also as always, if you use WARDROBE10 at checkout you get 10% off your order!

What I Bought and What I Thought

jcrew wide leg pants petite
A photo from a few weeks back wearing these J. Crew pants with my Birks and this t-shirt in size large. The bag is this one from Dagne Dover in size small.

In last week's Friday Shop, I shared a J. Crew blazer I bought and several asked me on social and email where the pants were from. I realize I never shared them here! They are these pants from J. Crew and they have become my go-to pants. Last year my go-to was a pair of black joggers, but this late summer has been these easy care wide-leg elastic waist chinos. Functional pockets, a waistband that doesn't fold over, a fabric that looks good right out of the dryer, six colors to choose from with petite and tall options… who could ask for anything more (other than an extended size range… you were doing so well J. Crew and have sunk back to where you used to be).

I have worn with a tank or fitted tee, belt and sandals. I've rocked them with a cami and cardigan and loafers. I think they'd look cute with sneakers, a graphic tee, and a denim or leather jacket. My usual look is them with Birkenstocks and either my Saint James Breton or a graphic tee tucked in or knotted at the waist. I am wearing size Large Petite.

monica vinader siren medium stacking ring

When I wrote this post about how to wear fall fashion trends in a warm climate, I mentioned how green is a big color this season. I added this Monica Vinader ring to my collage. And then watching the Met Gala live stream, I saw Ilana Glazer wearing a ring that looked awfully similar to it (after seeing the photo below I know it wasn't but at the time I thought it was the same ring). Gosh, everyone was wearing green jewelry accents! I LOVE green and was so excited to see this trend really making traction!

ilana glazers fingers met gala
NEW YORK, NEW YORK – SEPTEMBER 13: Ilana Glazer attends the 2021 Met Gala benefit “In America: A Lexicon of Fashion” at Metropolitan Museum of Art on September 13, 2021 in New York City. (Photo by Taylor Hill/WireImage)

I decided to treat myself to this ring. Monica Vinader uses recycled gold and silver and everything is responsibly manufactured. As usual, the Nordstrom site didn't have the full size range. When I went to the Monica Vinader site I found this ring in a range of colors, sizes, and available up to size 9. I bought a 9, the size of my right ring finger and occasionally in the winter, the size of my left middle finger.

The ring came quickly, it was packed in a low-waste but still elegant way that could be a beautiful gift (small shipping box designed to cradle the gift box that slid open like a drawer to feature the ring). The ring looks exactly like it does online. It fit. But even with the medium version of this ring, it's still a delicate ring on my hands and my hands would never be described as delicate.

I remember when I got roasted on multiple websites and message boards within the same week about my choice in rings. I didn't seek out this criticism, it came to me in Google Alerts and well-meaning readers. One site made a collage of all the rings I had worn in the past year, sharing how I always pick rings that are either too delicate or too big for my short chubby fingers and I have no concept of proportion. Others agreed how bad I was at picking out jewelry that flattered me.

IMG 1106
Texting my insecurities to my sister

When I put on this ring all those comments came rushing back. My hands are too chubby for this delicate ring. But I really liked the ring, I just thought it was so pretty. And do I have to sacrifice what I think is pretty because I have to wear what is proportional/flattering? If I say hell no to such rules with my clothing, I should be saying the same with my jewelry.

monica vinader ring wardrobe oxygen

I took two gold wire stacking rings I got on Etsy back when I was critiqued for my poor ring style and put one on either side of the Monica Vinader ring. They are a little loose and separated and made the ring look even cooler. And when they slid down to properly stack, the extra gold added that something that felt right. The right was still delicate and pretty, but it felt… like me. Comfortable. I have been wearing this combination ever since.

And I'll likely wear the ring by itself as I get comfortable with it (and as my fingers shrink when it gets cold so I can wear it on other fingers) but right now I'm digging this. It's such a small thing but we're hit with so many rules about what is considered flattering. Sure there are the clothing rules to make everyone's body appear as thin and long as possible with curves in just the right places. But we also have these rules tell us what haircuts we should wear for our face shape, what lipcolors we should wear for our skintone, what prints or bag sizes are appropriate for our body size, and even what size of jewelry is best for our proportions.

We keep growing and learning as we get older, lessons come from all sorts of places. It feels like I'm putting up a gold and green onyx-embellished middle finger to those rules by keeping this ring.

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38 Comments

  1. Heather
    September 27, 2021 / 9:52 am

    I’m an existing EQ customer and I tried to set up a new subscription with your code and it says “the coupon is not currently available.” Is it working for others?

    • September 27, 2021 / 9:58 am

      Let me check with them but I don’t know how soon I will get a response. I have had others make it work, and I know this sale isn’t over. Sorry for the issue, I’ll get back.

      • Heather
        September 27, 2021 / 10:00 am

        Thank you for checking with them! I appreciate it!

  2. Heidi
    September 26, 2021 / 12:05 pm

    That’s not a delicate ring, to me. Plus, what, am I not supposed to wear my engagement ring? Very few of us have a truly large one. Ugh, people!

  3. Jax
    September 25, 2021 / 3:32 pm

    Thank you so much for the selection of small wallets, including some French wallet sizes (my favorite type of wallet)! I was already using smaller wallets ever since I exclusively used crossbody bags the last 10 years, but yes, even more now, I need a small and slim wallet with my belt bag (even though I’m using the same not-tiny Girl Collective belt bag you use).

    I have never ever heard that delicate jewelry should only be won on slim fingers, etc.! (I also didn’t know people went to the trouble of making collages to criticize your style choices, wow! Definitely too much time on their hands.) I wore size 7 ring size for most of my life but after pregnancy it is now a size 8, which is already challenging to find in ring sizes. Size 7 seems to be the at the top of the normally offered range. I used to wear bigger, more vintage statement-y pieces in my 20s but then shifted to almost exclusively delicate pieces (both rings and necklaces) in my 30s.
    I feel like I’ve actually found the opposite — sometimes thicker, statement rings make my fingers look fatter, more squeezed. I love that same emerald or forest green of your new ring and I think like the other commenter — it’s a bit unbalanced with the thin band and the big stone. Just adding a couple thinner stacking bands in the same gold color would definitely help but in a way that complements the overall delicacy.

  4. Magzeen
    September 25, 2021 / 12:04 am

    This is my favorite wallet Women’s Genuine Leather Coin Purse Mini Pouch Change Wallet with Key Ring,rose https://amzn.to/3zMs8vu

    It’s less than 10 dollars and it can fit into small purses while comfortably holding close to a dozen cards, some cash and my keys. It has just enough pockets to keep me organized. It’s real leather and has held up for a couple of years now.

    • September 29, 2021 / 10:46 am

      This is a pretty perfect bag, thanks for sharing!

  5. Rebecca
    September 24, 2021 / 9:27 pm

    Am I correct that you also have been featuring a pair of J. Crew wide-leg chinos with a set-in waistband? I got the set-in ones and it’s my usual problem—a little too tight in the waist, but one size up was big on my hips. If you have both those and these elastic waist ones, which do you like better?

    • Colleen
      September 25, 2021 / 9:08 am

      I have the same issue and am also wondering which you prefer?

    • September 29, 2021 / 10:50 am

      Ugh, I just wrote a whole long comment and my platform ate it! Yes, I have these and the Foundry pants. They are both cotton, the Foundry have a set-in waist with button and fly. They look very different and style differently, but these elastic waist pants are more comfortable and wear better throughout the day. I reach for them far more often than the Foundry, which is more “outfit” and I wear when I am trying to look more put together. The Foundry ones also feel more fall and I’ve worn with boots while these feel more beachy and don’t look, at least in this color, as fall to me. But these I love so much I am tempted to get a second pair!

  6. Janet
    September 24, 2021 / 8:46 pm

    I’m so glad you showed the ring on your hand because of the actual COLOR! It looks like a dark green on your hand, whereas on the site where you order it, it looks Kelly green, which I love. Darn! But I like the dark green on you! Enjoy!

    • September 29, 2021 / 10:51 am

      The ring stone has no backing so it is affected by skintone, light hitting it, etc. Sometimes it looks very dark and other times it’s a bright Kelly green!

  7. September 24, 2021 / 4:09 pm

    How exactly do I apply the Equilibria code if I’m already a subscriber? I couldn’t figure out where to put the code in on an existing monthly order.

    • September 24, 2021 / 6:17 pm

      It’s not until you hit the payment section can you enter a referral or coupon code. I just tried it with a burner email and it’s at step 3 of checkout/

      • Heather
        September 27, 2021 / 9:53 am

        The code isn’t working for me and I’m an existing customer. It says “this coupon is not currently available” when I go to check out.

      • September 29, 2021 / 1:21 pm

        LOL, I accidentally processed the order without applying the code anyway because PANDEMIC BRAIN. I sent a message to them asking if they would retroactively apply the promo code so let’s see what happens.

  8. Allison
    September 24, 2021 / 3:57 pm

    Wow, I can’t believe that people would even comment on your ring choice other than to say how lovely it is! So nasty, but I notice a lot of blog comments are a bit snide these days. People even making snarky, mean comments about a poor little baby on IG!!! Not sure why but there seems to a growing culture of ‘nasty bitches’ out there and not just among the younger readers.
    I admire your style and fashion sense and really enjoy your blog. Haters gonna hate girl but you carry on, wear what works for you and what makes you feel good.

  9. Suzanne Schneider
    September 24, 2021 / 3:51 pm

    Thanks so much for all the new fall posts! I pulled out my Weejuns penny loafers to wear today to the grocery. (Do they count as menswear?)

    I got this wallet last month to replace one that was literally falling apart. It feels really well made & I love that I can find it in my bag. Note that the colors are not as brilliant as the photo – they’re more muted. Also, I’m not a floral person nor do I wear red, yellow or orange but I figured it doesn’t have to match anything. I must carry a bag of some sort because I have to have a medical emergency kit including syringe & vial with me at all times so a medium sized wallet is fine. https://amzn.to/3AS8rDW

    • September 29, 2021 / 10:51 am

      Your Weejuns are totally menswear and chic this fall! And that wallet is so cute!

  10. katelin
    September 24, 2021 / 3:28 pm

    I have to say, I love every damn thing you have in your final carousel. The pants, the orange bag, the rings! I wannnnntttt! It’s so great to see all these happy colors! Your comments on jewelry proportion and someone else dictating what you, a grown ass woman, should wear resonate with me. Whle I don’t notice the issue with jewelry, I feel it with things like skincare products. I wish as women we could just be allowed to exist in our own skin, allowed to age, and allowed to wear what we want.

  11. Em
    September 24, 2021 / 12:27 pm

    I have a similar Halo wallet hanging on my keys and it’s all I’ve used for well over a year. Easy to take in coat pocket or stick in waist bag or diaper bag!
    Looking into those Jcrew pants… and that Vida tote- great roundup!

  12. Amber
    September 24, 2021 / 12:05 pm

    My preferred wallet is a Bandolier phone case. Which I learned about from your blog. I can fit the half dozen cards I need in the pocket on the back of the Emma model, but I might get the matching Emma zip pouch to allow me to carry lipstick and a microfiber cloth for my glasses.

    • September 29, 2021 / 10:53 am

      I LOVE Bandolier… but once I started using my iPhone as my primary business camera, I could not keep up with buying new cases. I don’t have one for my current phone which I got last year. Maybe when I get the newer phone (which won’t be until next year). But it’s by far my favorite way to carry a phone and other essentials (love the additional pouches).

  13. Bette
    September 24, 2021 / 11:57 am

    I love small leather wallets and have quite the (unintended) collection. SKAGEN used to be my favorite, but they stopped making accessories. Of note, men’s wallets are often a great buy and of high quality. I used to find some very cool Italian leather ones at the Rack.

  14. Michele
    September 24, 2021 / 11:40 am

    people have WAYYYYYYYY too much time on their hands and WAYYYYY too much hate in their hearts if they are making negative comments on your choice of anything you put on your body. Period. You do you. Love the ring and I need that tee. Keep being fab.

    • hmbalison
      September 24, 2021 / 1:32 pm

      What she said!

      • Diane
        September 24, 2021 / 3:55 pm

        Ditto! If you love the ring than wear it!

    • Sabine
      September 27, 2021 / 10:58 am

      Came her to say exactly that.
      Get a life, people.
      Love the ring and how you wear it.

      PS: also love equilibria! Tried it after your review and now have a subscription for their drops, since they are the only ones that don’t have that weird aftertaste. Missed out on ordering a large one of their summer flavor … the little test one that came in the emergency pouch was delicious lol

  15. Laura
    September 24, 2021 / 11:28 am

    I have a small wallet that I love. https://www.mywalit.com/rfid-standard-wallet-storm.html
    My version is black with a rainbow pocket interior. Holds 8-10 cards, I put my health insurance cards and cash in the center pocket. I know we both love rainbows so I wanted to share the brand.

  16. Linda M
    September 24, 2021 / 11:12 am

    I have a small Brahmin wallet like you featured, and it’s fantastic. Looks brand new after two years, and carries my medical info, drivers license and basic credit cards. My solution to the card problem was to buy a true accordion card holder, one that holds at least ten cards (mine came from Chico’s). In it I put my store cards, reward cards, etc. It lives in my desk unless I plan a shopping trip, in which case I just pop it in my bag. I still carry a large bag, even a tote, but am a finding them heavy post pandemic (literally, not visually). Anything I can get out, I’m getting out. Your ring is gorgeous and will be great stacked and layered, as well as alone. I have short fingers too, and often wear huge rings, because I like them and they fit my overall style. Because I’m not a blogger, I don’t have to endure criticism that people would not (and should not) have the courage to say to my face. While it’s nice to be admired, it’s better to please yourself.

  17. Pat
    September 24, 2021 / 9:43 am

    Girl….wear whatever rings you want! FWIW the ring is cute and cute on you…loved the way you styled it with the other two rings.
    And stop following snark. LOL

  18. Ellen
    September 24, 2021 / 8:39 am

    Love the green ring! F those jerks! I’m really craving green things right now and I am keeping an eye on that ring.

    Also, I feel you on the wallet thing. I ditched my huge Hobo wallet for a small Hobo wallet last year – the Jill, it’s cute, I love it – and I’ve been carrying a small leather Baggu bucket bag instead of my big black BR tote for the past year and a half. Since I don’t plan to go back to an office – hopefully ever – I’ll probably never go back to the big, cumbersome wallet and bag, though I’m hanging onto them just in case life hands us another curveball that makes us have to carry a lot of crap on a daily basis!

  19. ErinG
    September 24, 2021 / 8:34 am

    It was a pretty ring before but when you added the bands- WOW! I love it- I am going to go through my rings and see what I can upcycle. Once again you’ve inspired me!
    As for the online critics- if I were reading that stuff about myself I would definitely take it personally and question my choices. However, looking at the comments that you have received it is mind-blowing that people would even “care” at all about someone’s ring choices?!?!?! Trolls must be pretty bored! Please continue to follow your heart and gut. We love you!

    • Marisa
      September 24, 2021 / 3:14 pm

      This! And WTH is a “flattering ring” anyway??

      But also, I think that the ring itself is kind of unbalanced, and your addition of the two stacking rings makes it look more balanced.

  20. Krista
    September 24, 2021 / 8:34 am

    I vote for the rainbow metallic wallet. I have the full sized wallet in that print and I absolutely love it. It’s fun, well made, easy to find in a bag. And so many compliments! When you pull it out it makes people smile.

  21. Linda
    September 24, 2021 / 8:14 am

    Girl, don’t hide your light under a bushel. Too many people are looking to you to shine. *&^ those haters, and have a great weekend.

    • Monica
      September 24, 2021 / 9:29 am

      This x100

  22. Leu2500
    September 24, 2021 / 7:01 am

    Wow! Those people on the internet criticizing you for your choice in rings? Bless their hearts. Their mamas must never have taught them “if you can’t say something nice…”

    The green is gorgeous. You’re so creative in how you personalize what you wear. And don’t you just love when you put something on & it makes you pretty/happy/strong/etc.

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