Open
Scenes from a Friday night…

We started at @littleblackbirddc a new wine bar in Cleveland Park where we had great food, drink, and conversation into the evening. We then headed down the street to @atomicbilliards for a whole different experience and to keep the conversation going. I treasure my friendships with @sylviacolella (who had a birthday recently), @districtofchic, and @blonde_inthedistrict they’re the real deal 🥰

My dress is @adamlippes borrowed via @renttherunway and Cheetos with Sauvignon Blanc is a really fun pairing!
Open
Night and day…

Met three dear friends for an early dinner that went on until after the sun set. Great food and conversation with some great women!

The dress is @adamlippes and I borrowed it from @renttherunway. The bag is @jcrew and a splurge but I regretted not buying it the last time they offered this bag and this color is SO me. I mean, look how great it is with these many years old suede heeled sandals? Meant to be!

This color combination makes me so happy, and this dress was comfy even after a decadent meal. We all deserve to experience comfort and joy with our wardrobes! 💛🩷

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4jnDf #ltkplussize #ltkmidsize #ltkover40 #midsizestyle #genxstyle #over40style
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If @thechicks are in town you can bet @debbiefaye78 and I will be there! So when we heard they were coming to @merriweatherpp we were so excited. And their concert did not disappoint. As always, a phenomenal show! If The Chicks come to your neck of the woods I highly recommend you go!

Okay I know you want to know about what we’re wearing! 

My sister’s caftan is from @anthropologie (bought this summer so maybe you can find on resale sites).

I’m wearing a @bananarepublic dress also from this summer with the @universalstandard denim chore jacket and a hat I got from a @madewell collab a year or so ago. I glammed it up with some gold chains and gold drop earrings, but kept it comfy for a night of standing and dancing with @birkenstock sandals.

This was my first big outing since my eye surgery, and with a pocketful of eye drops I felt good (and grateful we splurged for good seats!).

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4jcBL #ltkmidsize #ltkover40 #midsizestyle #genxstyle #usinthewild #concertstyle
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For years I’ve trusted @somaintimates for the right bras and the right fit but it had been a while since I visited a Soma boutique to try on all the styles they currently have for a large bust. I must say I was impressed! Knowledgeable staff, extensive collection in larger sizes, and some of the most comfortable and innovative bras in up to H cups! Each body is different but what I loved:

- The Stunning Push-Up: targeted for the DD+ customer gives amazing lift and great shape under fitted knits.

- The Unbelievable Lift Scoop Balconette: sexy, supportive, and so lightweight!

- The Embraceable Wireless: I’ve recommended this wireless bra for large busts for years and was in need for a new one! 

- The Stunning Support Smooth Balconette: this is the perfect t-shirt bra for large busts with padded straps and disappears under knits

- The Stunning Starlet Multi-Way Strapless: recently improved for more support and more comfort, this wireless bra stays put and gives fab shape

I also picked up some of Soma’s iconic Vanishing Edge panties which keep you line-free. The whole Vanishing collection is genius. I loved being able to donate my gently used bras at my local Soma boutique to give to those in need. We all deserve a lift and Soma strives to achieve that. It’s why I’ve been a fan and customer for years and am honored to partner with them. Soma is the perfect fitting bra solution. Visit the link in my bio to shop and to find your local Soma boutique! #SomaPartner #SomaBraFit #SomaStartsWithMe
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If I close my eyes you can’t tell one is still bloodshot 😜

Still recovering from my eye surgery but feeling more myself. Getting dolled up helps me feel me. Bright colors and bold jewelry have been signature Alison since I was a kid! 

Sweater: @favorite.daughter 
Earrings: Amazon
Necklace: @_jennybird (old)
Ring: @realmfinejewelry 
Bra: @lovebravissimo 
Lipstick: @glossier 
Pins as “cufflinks”: vintage

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4j0LM #ltkmidsize #midsizestyle #over40style #ltkover40 #genxstyle
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It was so funny and so quick I couldn’t not share! I bought this @hulkenbag a year ago and use it all the time. Carting shoot supplies, groceries, packing for road trips, and carting donations. This weekend @thenewdealcafe in @cityofgreenbelt hosted a community clothing swap so I made sure my family and I went through our summer wardrobes to gather that which we no longer needed or fit.

This wasn’t the first clothing swap and folks in town know my style (and my job) so there were some waiting for my arrival. Look how fast I cleared out this big bag! Speaking of the bag one other swap attendee said she got herself a Hulken after seeing mine in action!

It’s so great to know our old clothes are getting a good life and this bag makes carting them to the cafe so easy! I got my Hulken on Amazon, it comes in other colors and sizes too: https://amzn.to/48iTY4Y yep the bag is as great as all those ads you see on social media, I’m a big fan!
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I had to see… I asked my husband how often he thinks about the Roman Empire, and then asked our 14-year-old 😂
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#ad Go through my archives on Wardrobe Oxygen and one thing is clear: my family and I are a fan of @bombas socks! From their no-slip no-show socks to their iconic crew socks, Bombas makes great socks for the whole family while having a great heart.

Socks are the #1 requested article of clothing from homeless shelters. For every item purchase from Bombas, one is donated to someone experiencing homelessness. 

Save 20% on your first purchase at Bombas with my exclusive promo code: WARDROBE20

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4ipHy #bombas
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Happy gotcha day, Oscar! Four years ago he came into our life and we are so happy to have in our family!

Oscar was a rescue and came with some… quirks. Over the years we have come to understand him and he has come to trust us. He’s a diva, a snuggler, he could play catch for hours, and he’s my husband’s shadow. 

We’ve never had a small breed dog before and it’s a whole different experience. But we adore Oscar and couldn’t imagine our life without him! Thank you for coming into our life Oskie McGoskie! 🐾❤️
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Fashion Advice, Corporate Fashion · March 18, 2008

The Commuter Curse

This article may contain affiliate links; if you click on a shopping link and make a purchase I may receive a commission. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. 

One of the greatest things about my new job is taking public transportation. I know you must think I am crazy to say that, but I love the People Watching (a sport that deserve to be capitalized), and I love the interaction. For years I have lived in my car, alone on my rush hour commute and then alone in my office or cubicle for the majority of the day. Often I would spend a day never speaking to a soul outside of a hello when passing a coworker in the hallway. Now I get to read, listen to music, and be surrounded by my fellow humans. It's pretty great… until I am assaulted by the hideous fashion of the Woman Commuter.

I too am a female commuter, and I understand why so many fellow women end up getting the Commuter Curse. It is so easy, so comfortable, and you think no one will notice.

Well ladies, though we may pretend that the sweaty mouth-breather may not be pressed up against us on the subway, we are not invisible. Think about your next commuter – try as you may to hide behind your New York Times Bestseller and iPod, you are aware of those around you. If you are aware of them, they are aware of you.

The Commuter Curse is when women (I hardly ever see a man succumb to this curse) begin to let certain elements of style slide. They feel that no one will notice, or justify it based upon cost or comfort. As someone who walks about a mile each day from her car in the commuter lot, through the Washington DC subway system to her place of employment, I too look for that which makes that trek the most comfortable and easy. The thing is, you are able to be a comfortable and organized commuter and not get The Commuter Curse.

Some steps to be cured of The Commuter Curse:

vests1. Don't ever think swag is appropriate fashion. This means fleeces embroidered with your company logo, or microfiber messenger bags with silkscreened designs. It seems the higher up the corporate ladder (or the longer you work for a government agency) the more conferences and workshops you attend. With every workshop there seems to be at least one item with a logo on it: a travel mug, a tote bag, a polo shirt. These are great things to wear and use for your company retreat, to wear for your next conference or even to carry your groceries in, but they are not appropriate fashion.

2. If you must have commuter shoes, treat them with respect. I am starting to have knee problems, and realize it is due to me walking down so many stairs in subway stations while wearing heels. My commute home has me walk down five separate escalators, most that are out of service. I am looking into a pair of flat shoes I can tuck in my bag and put on just for my trip home.

This doesn't mean I will be strutting around the Nation's Capital in white Reebok Classics with black hose. Modern technology has given us many styles of footwear that are just as comfortable and supportive as a pair of tennies but look far more stylish. Every day I see women in gorgeous coats over stylish suits and outfits and then clunky sneakers ruining the whole look.

Nor will I be wearing a pair of old, scuffed and run-down flats that have been in my closet for a decade. These types of shoes are even more prevalent than the foot marshmallows. Yes, they have been molded to fit your foot perfectly after all these years, but they look disgusting and totally ruin your entire look. This also includes newer yet cheap flats that have lost their shape, been permanently stained or torn. They may be cute little yellow suede ballet flats, but they have a grease stain down the side, the sole is peeling from the shoe and you have walked on the back so much they have morphed from flats to slides.

I never understand it; many of us walk blocks and blocks passing hundreds of people in such monstrosities, and then get to the office, put on our nice shoes and then hide behind a desk all day, the only person seeing the fancy footwear is the receptionist or the one coworker in the kitchen when you went to grab your morning cup of coffee.

3. Don't wear your bed linens to work. Yes, it can get quite cold, and it is silly to wear a cute jacket and chance frostbite or illness. However, this does not mean you need to walk around town in a down comforter with sleeves. Don't get me wrong, I have a black quilted knee-length coat that I wear on blustery days; I am talking about the really puffy coats, the ones that fall to your ankles with a huge hood, fur trim and no shape. I am talking about the thick fleece and wool coats that look like bathrobes.

Again, modern invention have brought us wonderful materials such as Thinsulate, Gore-Tex, and Windstopper that are thin yet keep you warm and dry.

Keep in mind that your coat will be worn more than almost any other item in your wardrobe. It is worth the time and money to find the right style that will flatter and properly fit your figure, compliment your clothing collection and still keep you toasty.

short4. Have your pants hemmed to match your shoes. I understand that a commuter shoe is flat and an office shoe may have a heel, however it is never acceptable to peg or cuff your work trousers to keep them from dragging on the street or spend the day in highwaters. If you feel a flat commuter shoe is a necessity, you may have to suck it up like I have and adjust your office heel height. Every day I see beautiful, well-dressed women in pants that are dragging, cuffed awkwardly or above the ankle bones. No point in spending good money on trousers if they make you look like Pee-Wee Herman.

4. Know you are never invisible. Often we women feel we are invisible when we have a less-than-perfect body, average wardrobe or what we deem as ordinary features. We think no one will notice if we go a day without brushing our hair or have our pants too short. We’re not important, right?

Wrong. You are never invisible, and you are important. Think about yourself when heading to work; don’t you notice those around you? Do you ever start daydreaming, and wonder about that person on the seat across from you? What is she reading, what does she do for a profession to warrant her attire? If you do it about another, be sure it is being done in regards to you.

When you feel you aren’t important enough to be noticed, it is as though you have a neon sign blinking above your head saying “LOW SELF ESTEEM!” I am not saying one should dedicate her whole life to looking good to impress others, but give your body the same respect you hopefully give your home or your office. You should be clean, tidy, and look as though you like yourself. You have this body whether you like it or not, make the best of it. As you would jazz up an apartment with new drapes and artwork to make it look less like a sterile white box, so should you decorate yourself. You are noticed, every day whether you realize it or not. Give the right first impression, the one that properly represents the true you!

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In: Fashion Advice, Corporate Fashion

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Comments

  1. Anonymous says

    April 24, 2009 at 1:43 pm

    I commute to NYC from Long Island every day (therefore I take the Long Island Rail Road and the subway). The latest “trend” that I have noticed is women using their reusable shopping bags as commuter totes! Ladies, those bags were not made to tote your laptops, lunches, etc!

    Reply
  2. shoegal says

    April 5, 2008 at 2:17 am

    Allie I adore your other blog and just stumbled across this one. I work in Manhattan and most days lay out two pairs of shoes — the pair I wear to work and the pair I wear at work. I adore loafers and driving mocs for the cooler months and ballet flats for summer. I wait until the end of season sales to stock up on favorites in multiple colors.

    The real reason I’m leaving a comment is that your last point really hit home for me — so many days I feel invisible trudging from the train to subway, subway to sidewalk, all the way to my office, and back again. It just really made me feel like I’m not the only one who thinks/feels this way. And that really brightened up my entire week, which was desperately needed. 🙂

    Reply
  3. Sara says

    March 24, 2008 at 2:10 pm

    I walk 5 blocks from my bus stop to my office and I wear my blue and white nike gym shoes and change into my heels at my desk. My view on it is that I am shleping my gym shoes anyway for my post-work workout so why would I want to carry ANOTHER pair of shoes with me to work? I thought about this today as I was walking in with my sneakers on and admiring other people’s outfits with matching shoes. But in the end, I decided that I dress for me, not the other women on the train/bus. If they judge me, so be it. I figure that they probably realize I am not planning on wearing my marshmallow shoes around all day anyway. Oh, and regarding your comment about not cuffing up your pants while wearing your commuter shoes, well you can’t have it both ways, really. I wear commuting shoes because I like to wear heels at work. If I were wearing flats at work, I’d wear them to walk in too.

    Reply
  4. j.lowe says

    March 20, 2008 at 1:38 am

    ethidiumbromide and anonymous, I agree, we all commute, but I believe Allie is referring to a special class or group of individuals, “The Commuters,” who take public transit to and from their 9AM-6PM professional attired jobs. Public transit usually means taking the bus, subway/underground, even a train. Because you are inside with a large, fairly set group of people, Allie’s point is that you should still be aware of your appearance.

    If you’re walking over a mile, then by all means wear what gets you there.

    Reply
  5. Anonymous says

    March 19, 2008 at 2:55 pm

    I have to agree with EthidiumBromide – I walk 3 miles to work. Wearing the wrong shoes could actually cause me injury. Plus, I live in Chicago, where it’s so cold 6 months of the year that I’m wrapped up head to toe.

    Having said that, it really frustrates me that my clothing choices are either to look “frumpy” by keeping on my commuting outfit, or to look “professional” by changing into something completely different. I want to look like a lady, but it seems that “professional” clothing for women involves crippling oneself with heels. I hate that to fit in with all the other professional women, I need to wear shoes that slow down even a walk down the hall to get coffee. (Even comfortable medium heels are less practical than equivalent flat shoes)

    Yes, I know there are cute flats, which is what I customarily wear in the office, but it still seems that heels are the default.

    Reply
  6. sarah cool says

    March 19, 2008 at 1:20 am

    i love that you believe looking beautiful is all about the outside AND inside. i love your writing, allie!!! thanks for encouraging us all.

    Reply
  7. Amy says

    March 18, 2008 at 7:30 pm

    OMG, Allie, I took the Marc train in, and then the Metro, and I was afraid you were going to see me and use me as a style “don’t” so I made sure to look presentable today 🙂

    I’ve got a pair of black leather ballet flats that I wear in the winter for long schleps, and a tan pair in the summer (Lands’ End). The first poster might want to look into LE’s walking shoes – they’re unobtrusive and comfortable for a 2.5 m hike.

    Great post as always, Allie! You personally saved me from wearing a schlumpy too-long khaki skirt today in D.C. 🙂

    Amy

    Reply
  8. astarte's student says

    March 18, 2008 at 7:23 pm

    Trinny and Susannah from What Not to Wear had similar comments. For some reason, one of the moments of the show that stuck out for me was helping a woman find fashionable athletic shoes (rather than more worn out everyday sneakers) that would work for walking (and could fit in your bag when you get there). It helps you maintain that ‘professional’ look even when you need to be comfortable. I don’t fault anyone else for being comfortable, but I like to combine style and comfort when I can.

    Reply
  9. bananzattack says

    March 18, 2008 at 7:14 pm

    It’s so true that we wear our grubby shoes to get to work and then put on our nice shoes to hide under the desk. I think I will throw away a pair of flattened flats when I get home today. 🙂

    Reply
  10. Anonymous says

    March 18, 2008 at 6:48 pm

    I live in Ohio(car-to-door commute), and I was quite amused when I visited DC last year, to see women wearing nice office outfits with new balance gym shoes.

    Reply
  11. EthidiumBromide says

    March 18, 2008 at 4:41 pm

    I see absolutely nothing wrong with dressing for comfort above style when it comes to commuting. While your appearance may play a role in your productivity and success in the workplace, what one chooses to wear on the way to and from work has absolutely no bearing on the quality of work which is completed when in the office. I walk over 2.5 miles each way to get to work, so I always wear sneakers. Yes, there are flats out there, but I have yet to find a pair of cute flats that provides the support I need (I have severe back problems) so that I can walk pain-free. I would much rather make it from Point A to Point B pain-free and as quickly as possible in a pair of sneakers and then change to heels than walk in discomfort just for the sake of looking more fashionable during my commute. Sorry, but in my field, nobody is going to stop me on the street and fire/hire me because I’m wearing a pair of sneakers to get to work.
    It is certainly not because I think I am “invisible” that I don’t care, but because frankly, if someone is going to judge me negatively because I am wearing a pair of sneakers to walk 2.5 miles, then frankly I really don’t want to associate myself with them!

    Reply

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Since 2005, Wardrobe Oxygen has offered real-life style advice for grown-ass women. With years of experience as an apparel visual merchandiser and personal shopper, Alison Gary provides advice on how to achieve personal style no matter your age, size, or budget.

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Sep 26

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Scenes from a Friday night…

We started at @littleblackbirddc a new wine bar in Cleveland Park where we had great food, drink, and conversation into the evening. We then headed down the street to @atomicbilliards for a whole different experience and to keep the conversation going. I treasure my friendships with @sylviacolella (who had a birthday recently), @districtofchic, and @blonde_inthedistrict they’re the real deal 🥰

My dress is @adamlippes borrowed via @renttherunway and Cheetos with Sauvignon Blanc is a really fun pairing!

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Sep 23

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Night and day…

Met three dear friends for an early dinner that went on until after the sun set. Great food and conversation with some great women!

The dress is @adamlippes and I borrowed it from @renttherunway. The bag is @jcrew and a splurge but I regretted not buying it the last time they offered this bag and this color is SO me. I mean, look how great it is with these many years old suede heeled sandals? Meant to be!

This color combination makes me so happy, and this dress was comfy even after a decadent meal. We all deserve to experience comfort and joy with our wardrobes! 💛🩷

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4jnDf #ltkplussize #ltkmidsize #ltkover40 #midsizestyle #genxstyle #over40style

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Sep 21

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If @thechicks are in town you can bet @debbiefaye78 and I will be there! So when we heard they were coming to @merriweatherpp we were so excited. And their concert did not disappoint. As always, a phenomenal show! If The Chicks come to your neck of the woods I highly recommend you go!

Okay I know you want to know about what we’re wearing! 

My sister’s caftan is from @anthropologie (bought this summer so maybe you can find on resale sites).

I’m wearing a @bananarepublic dress also from this summer with the @universalstandard denim chore jacket and a hat I got from a @madewell collab a year or so ago. I glammed it up with some gold chains and gold drop earrings, but kept it comfy for a night of standing and dancing with @birkenstock sandals.

This was my first big outing since my eye surgery, and with a pocketful of eye drops I felt good (and grateful we splurged for good seats!).

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4jcBL #ltkmidsize #ltkover40 #midsizestyle #genxstyle #usinthewild #concertstyle

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Sep 19

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If I close my eyes you can’t tell one is still bloodshot 😜

Still recovering from my eye surgery but feeling more myself. Getting dolled up helps me feel me. Bright colors and bold jewelry have been signature Alison since I was a kid! 

Sweater: @favorite.daughter 
Earrings: Amazon
Necklace: @_jennybird (old)
Ring: @realmfinejewelry 
Bra: @lovebravissimo 
Lipstick: @glossier 
Pins as “cufflinks”: vintage

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4j0LM #ltkmidsize #midsizestyle #over40style #ltkover40 #genxstyle

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Sep 11

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Happy gotcha day, Oscar! Four years ago he came into our life and we are so happy to have in our family!

Oscar was a rescue and came with some… quirks. Over the years we have come to understand him and he has come to trust us. He’s a diva, a snuggler, he could play catch for hours, and he’s my husband’s shadow. 

We’ve never had a small breed dog before and it’s a whole different experience. But we adore Oscar and couldn’t imagine our life without him! Thank you for coming into our life Oskie McGoskie! 🐾❤️

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Sep 8

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I can see clearly now…

Actually I can’t, but things after my retina surgery are much improved! My next appointment is in a month and I’m cleared to get back into the world (with some restrictions to protect my eye).

With a sclera buckle, it changes your eye shape and now I am nearsighted again (I had lasik a few years ago). Once the eye is stabilized I can get glasses or contacts but until then I’m 20/20 in one eye and right now 20/60 in the other. But the eye is healing beautifully and I feel positive!

And I could see clearly enough to fall for this poppy-colored cotton jumpsuit from @pistoladenim. It comes in a few colors but this one is my favorite. I went with XL (im@a 14, sometimes 16) and likely could have sized down but I enjoy the relaxed fit and the drawstring waistband to create shape. And hello zipper closure making it super easy to get on and off!

My husband took this photo right after my eye appointment, I think it reflects my positive attitude and feeling of hope! 🧡

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Sep 5

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I’ll be a bit quiet on here and other channels because I had eye (retinal) surgery this past weekend. I was having what I thought were ocular migraines but come to find out I was experiencing lattice degeneration, which is thinning/holes in the retina. I had surgery Saturday for my right eye and later on they’ll work on the left eye, which isn’t as bad and can be remedied by laser, in office.

I share not because I’m Mrs. Frizzle meets Iris Apfel as I recuperate at home, but because this whole thing has been a lesson on trusting my gut. And I want to remind you to do the same.

As we get older our bodies can feel like strangers. Things are constantly changing and it’s easy to just assume your annual physical will catch anything wrong. But if you slow down and listen to your body you’ll know when things are just a sign of aging and life and what seems unusual. That nagging issue may be something more serious.

And if you’re seeing flashing lights, floaters, spiderwebs or other odd eye things get checked out ASAP. It may be nothing but take it from me, it may actually be something. ❤️

Okay, going back to my big sunglasses caftan recuperation life!

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Aug 30

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Ladies who lunch…

While in Savannah, I made sure to get lunch reservations for me and E at @theoldepinkhouse she loves the color pink, historic homes, and ghost stories so it was a perfect choice! 

Built in 1789 on Reynolds Square, there are stories of guests seeing ghosts, cutlery and wine bottles moving along with an elegant and truly delicious dining. 

While we didn’t see any apparitions, we did have a lovely lunch with impeccable service and after toured all floors of the home. I highly recommend a visit if you’re visiting Savannah!

My dress is from @cosstores (no longer available); hat is @furtalk and bag is @talbotsofficial (no longer available).

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Aug 29

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Scenes from a week in Savannah… 

The three of us (and our dog Oscar!) had a warm and humid but wonderful time exploring Savannah, Georgia earlier this month. Our daughter visited this gorgeous city last summer with her @girlscouts troop but wanted to return to experience more. We let her choose our adventures and play your guide and it was awesome. We cannot wait to visit again, though next time it won’t be August 🥵

For more of our trip check the “Savannah” highlight on my profile page!

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Aug 28

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Stripes are always right…

Y’all know I love stripes and when @universalstandard came out with their Breton-stripe dresses and tops I HAD to try them! As expected, the quality is stellar, the fit boosts my confidence, and I appreciate the range of colors (5 different stripes to choose from) and sizes (00-50). For reference, I’m wearing XS but preferred S for the top and I usually wear a 14 or XL in other brands.

The tote is @able and it’s a soft yet durable leather that just looks better with time. This color (cognac) is one that transitions nicely from summer to fall. 

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
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#usinthewild #bretonstripes #midsizestyle #midsizefashion #size14 #over40style

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