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The perfect red for the holiday season 💄

I love a red lipstick, especially in winter. It adds brightness to gray days and skin not exposed to the sun. Look in my dressing table and you’ll find at least a dozen different red lipsticks. But this winter my go-to red is “Relax” by @flyte.70 

Glossy but not sticky, long wearing but not drying, the Flyte.70 L+L.LipLacquer feels like a lip balm. One layer is a hint of color and shine; add more layers for more pigment, gloss, and impact. This isn’t the only Flyte.70 lip color I have and love; I regularly wear “Fast Car” which is a modern version of the brown lipsticks we loved in the 90s that looks so good with the neutrals popular right now.

And with products named after songs from the 80s and 90s I couldn’t not use this Frankie Goes to Hollywood song for this lip color!

This isn’t paid, it’s a PSA because I know it’s hard to find good red lip colors. And @flyte.70 is a U.S.-based woman-owned ethical beauty brand created specifically for U.S. grown women and I find the quality stellar.

Use code WOXYGEN15 for 15% off your order at Flyte.70

The quickest and cheapest way to update your wardrobe for the holidays is with a glossy red lip! 💄

#over40style #genxstyle #genxbeauty #flyte70
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The tree is trimmed! 🎄

When I was a single gal, I had the prettiest tree with a color story and theme. 20 years later, my tree is a hodgepodge of inherited ornaments, gifts from loved ones, and handmade pieces from both my childhood and by my child. And I think each year it veers further from the original concept the more beautiful it becomes!

My daughter and I donned our Santa hats, turned on the holiday playlist, a Yule log on the TV, and spent the afternoon getting our home into the Christmas spirit.

When she was little, my husband would pick her up so she could place the star on top of the tree. Now that she’s taller than I am, when he got home he just put his arm around her as she used the library stool to reach the top. Some traditions need to be modified with time but they’re still special! ⭐️

Top is a feather trimmed Breton from @talbotsofficial; the scarf as a belt is also Talbots but a few years old. The jeans are @landsend and the blanket on the chair in the second photo is by artist  @zanderschlacter
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My therapist recommended I walk outside more as I grieve the recent loss of my mom.

When it was time to pay for my mom’s funeral, the credit card I had in my wallet was my @bananarepublic Mastercard. I’ve had this card for decades because over the years, most of our family have worn some Gap brand. From onesies to tuxedos, we’ve updated our wardrobes with points.

And I got a serious chunk of points for charging my mom’s funeral expenses on my Banana card.

I decided to use them to buy clothes for winter outdoor walking. Nothing motivates me more than a chance to put together a cute outfit. This cute look is from @athleta, one of the few activewear brands that fits both my size and my style.

My Athleta purchase arrived on my doorstep and that day, a neighbor reached out, inviting me to join a group of women in our community who were supporting, not competing, to move 100k. I immediately said yes and signed up. 

This past week I hit 100k. And this past week week it has been two months she has been gone. I’m still going 💪 

Wearing XL. For reference I’m 5’3” and usually wear a size 14.

I share details on all my looks on the @shop.LTK app. You can use the app or desktop, search for @wardrobe_oxygen or use the link https://liketk.it/4pFaS
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Normalizing the normal everyday outfit…

It was a day of running errands, running to the office, and then running into friends. It rained off and on so I wanted shoes for potential puddles and a coat that wouldn’t soak through but also keep me warm.

The sweater is @universalstandard; I bought it thinking it was a bold purple but the color was off on the site and I got plum. But I think I like this better. I’m wearing a S. This is my second of this cardigan, it is super soft, dense, and holds up to washing. My other one I got a year ago and still wear all the time.

The jeans are @oldnavy and while they’re not perfect and stretch out throughout the day they were around $18 and I like the wash and weight of the denim. I’m wearing a 14 Short.

The boots are old Docs, the coat I got at @talbotsofficial last winter, and the bag is @maxwellscottuk and I’ve had for almost a decade. Earrings are @_jennybird, necklace is @gorjana. 

Disclosure: the coat was gifted last year but remains a favorite. The necklace was also gifted about a year ago but I keep wearing because I like it and it has held up quality-wise. The rest I bought. 

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!

#liketkit #LTKfindsunder50 #LTKover40 #LTKmidsize #midsizestyle #genxstyle #over40style #size14 #usinthewild 
https://liketk.it/4pDXG
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Counteract the gray days with cozy colorful clothes! 🌈 This cashmere sweater set is the prettiest teal and I loved how it looked with this candy pink Chesterfield coat. All are from @anntaylor one of my favorite places to shop because Ann has petites over a size 12. Also all of these items are on sale!

While I did receive these clothes as a gift from Ann Taylor I am under no obligation to share with you. This is what I wore to work and when I saw these colors against the green of my building door I had to prop up my phone and capture the color combo!

This sweater is a classic and with the skirt is created a dress effect you can style with tall boots, ankle boots and tights, or dress down with sneakers. I linked to other pieces in this color that would also look dreamy with this skirt, as well as other gorgeous colorful coats.

For reference I am wearing the coat in XL petite and the sweater set in L. I am 5’3” and usually wear a 14/16

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content! https://liketk.it/4plYr 

#LTKmidsize #ltkover40 #midsizestyle #genxstyle #size14 #midsizepetite #ThisIsAnn
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Just got back from a 4-night getaway with my sister @debbiefaye78 at @curacaomarriottbeachresort. It was a last-minute planned trip that ended up being perfect. We weren’t ready to celebrate Thanksgiving without our mom and this escape what just what our hearts needed. 

I’ll be sharing more once I finally unpack my suitcase and organize my photos and thoughts; but I couldn’t not share this picture from yesterday morning. Debbie and I got up early to enjoy some of the day at the resort before flying home to DC. We had the infinity pool to ourselves, finished our books, and relaxed before a long day of travel. 🌴
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It’s hard when you’re petite and most models aren’t; you have no idea how clothes, especially jeans will fit. To promote @universalstandard’s Denim Drive sale, the company sent me two pairs of jeans of my choice. And I chose to make this video to show how they fit on my 5’3” body. I am usually a 14/32 in jeans but at Universal Standard I wear a 12 because they’re super stretchy and generously sized. 

With jeans as low as $35 in sizes 00-40, this is a sale not to be missed. And use code INFS-BFALISON10 for an additional 10% off sitewide!

The Farrah Flare is a favorite because at my height, most flare jeans will lose what makes them special once hemmed. At a 30” inseam these are great with low heels or lug soles.

The Etta is a straight jean with a vintage fit. If in doubt size down. They’re also super stretchy and the 28” inseam (they also come in 31”) works with my boots and sneakers.

While I was provided the apparel in this Reel for free, I was not paid or contracted to create this content. Consider it a PSA for my fellow shorties shopping this fab denim sale!

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4oWOQ #ltkmidsize #ltkplussize #ltkover40 #ltksalealert #uspartner #midsizestyle
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Thanks to @talbotsofficial I’m ready for the holidays! #AD

I love Talbots for holiday fashion and this season’s new arrivals do not disappoint. And for Black Friday the entire site is 40% off with free shipping on orders $150+. Until noon, you also receive 50% off 1 regular price item!

I ordered pieces from the Talbots Holiday Collection and found great quality, great style, and great versatility. How cute is the Breton stripe bateau neck with the removable feather cuffs? The metallic plaid patio skirt is so fun, and these two dresses can glam up or dress down with a change of footwear and bag. For reference, I am wearing everything in either XL or 16 petite.

The ivory cords are also Talbots; the black trousers are from last year’s Talbots Holiday Collection showing how Talbots has lasting style. I’ve linked to exact or very similar in my LTK shop. Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.ltk app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content! https://liketk.it/4oDJF

#mytalbots modernclassicstyle #wondersoftheseason #ltkover40 #ltkplussize #ltkmidsize #blackfridaysale
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@somaintimates makes it easy to shop for a range of personas this holiday season! #AD With gift guides for a range of personality types, you can easily find great gifts for your loved ones. I was drawn to the creative one, loving the rich colorful florals, luxe satin, lace trim, and of course Soma’s iconic Cool Nights sleepwear! Visit Soma’s gift guide for tips on finding the perfect present this holiday season. #SomaGiftGuide #SomaStartsWithMe
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Real-life style for grown women

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Fall, Outfit Posts, Summer · August 19, 2022

Styling an M.M.LaFleur Sweater Set and Figure Flattery

This article may contain affiliate links; if you click on a shopping link and make a purchase I may receive a commission. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. 

Alison Gary of Wardrobe Oxygen outside Pennyroyal Station restaurant in Mount Rainier, Maryland. She is wearing a cream popcorn knit M.M.LaFleur sweater set of calf-length skirt and matching long-sleeved crewneck. She has a cream leather belt bag as a crossbody and is wearing white Adidas sneakers.

When researching the best fall fashion trends for grown women I saw sweater sets and knitwear in general were having a thing. I was psyched because in May I got this sweater and this skirt from M.M.LaFleur. On the first low-humidity and mild day where I had plans, I decided to style it. Below I share the ideas I have for how to style this M.M.LaFleur sweater set, and the mindset I had in choosing what I chose. Can you relate?

Disclosure: I received this sweater set as a gift from M.M.LaFleur in thanks for visiting their showroom and sharing my experience on social. I was able to pick which pieces I wanted, and after trying this set, I knew this is what I wanted even though the idea of wearing a sweater in the DC area from Memorial Day until the end of September is self-induced torture. It was just too beautiful to resist!

mm la fleur sweater set
A screenshot from my Instagram Reel showing pieces I tried on at the M.M.LaFleur showroom in DC.

My Mindset while Styling This M.M.LaFleur Sweater Set

When I originally tried on this M.M.LaFleur sweater set at their K Street showroom back in May (as seen in this Instagram Reel), I was wearing my gold Margaux Uptown Sandals and I liked the effect. While the ankle straps cut my leg line and emphasize my wide ankles, they provide security and help make these shoes surprisingly comfortable for being high heels. And with my height and shape, heels help to balance my figure. I saw myself wearing this combination with gold hoops and this purse which I have in ivory for going to the theater or another fun/date night.

I also envisioned this sweater and skirt set with heeled knee-high boots. I have one pair of black heeled knee-high boots with an almond toe; the slim toebox elongates the body while looking sophisticated and I already shared my thoughts on heels when being a short, curvy body. While flat boots would be more practical and comfortable, the heel will provide better proportions. My black boots are literally disintegrating but I can't find any other boots with as nice of a style that come wide enough for my XX-wide calves and thick shins.

A whole column of nubby cream knit isn't going to do anything for my figure, so I would have to accessorize. Maybe my Maxwell Scott saddlebag I've had for years which can be a shoulderbag or a crossbody and hits at a flattering point on my hip and maybe a scarf at my throat or probably a gold link necklace to finish the look (the necklace is better for my short neck and full chin than a scarf, especially with this neckline).

over 40 fashion advice
FYI, I am wearing both pieces in size XL. They both come in sizes XS-XXL.

But for an afternoon lunch date, sneakers seemed like the right choice. I recently got these from Adidas. My Superstars were looking a bit raggedy even with my usual sneaker cleaning hacks and I was thinking of getting another of the same but then saw these in that widget that shows you what is popular or recommended to those looking at this product. They're not what I'd usually get, being higher up on the ankle, which reduces the slim part between my feet and calves. But my daughter suggested I try them and I'm glad she did.

The belt bag is from Brandon Blackwood and I got it last year. It was the same color as the sweater set so I immediately tried it. I wondered if my ivory braided leather crossbody from Chico's (sold out, from this early summer) would be better since the longer slim strap wouldn't add bulk to my chest. But I really like this belt bag and don't wear it as often as I think I would if I didn't have a couple of followers on Instagram DM me over the past year and tell me that the bag wasn't as flattering as other bags in my wardrobe.

mm la fleur sweater xl

Since I chose this bag with silver hardware, it inspired me to wear silver jewelry. These hoops are from Denisa Piatti; I share how I acquired these custom hoops from Denisa Piatti in this post. The cuff I bought back in 1997; I bent it to fit over my WHOOP tracking bracelet.

I've always liked big chunky jewelry, on me and on others. I think it looks more proportional on my short curvy frame, though I usually get comments that smaller pieces would be more flattering to my petite stature. However, I also get comments that sometimes my jewelry is too delicate for my curvy frame (especially when it comes to rings and my chubby fingers). It's hard to know what to do with comments like these; you can ignore them but they still gnaw at the back of your mind, especially when they trigger self-image issues you've been battling all your life.

When I tried on this M.M.LaFleur sweater set in the K Street Showroom, I also hiked up the skirt to my rib cage. Being 5'3″ with wide calves, I knew a skirt at this lower-calf length would just make me look shorter and my calves wider. But I felt the skirt at a shorter length with the sneakers looked too much K Street Employee and brought it back down to my natural waist.

That Internal Dialogue As We Get Dressed

Did any of these thoughts about styling and figure flattery sound familiar to you? Do you ever have such conversations with yourself while getting dressed or going shopping?

Alison is leaning against the muraled wall at the front of Pennyroyal Station, a restaurant on busy Rhode Island Avenue in Mount Rainier, a city on the Washington DC border. She is wearing a cream sweater knit calf-length skirt and matching crewneck with white Adidas sneakers. She has a Brandon Blackwood cream tumbled leather belt bag worn as a crossbody; she is touching the bag and smiling at the camera.

As someone who has photographed herself and her outfit almost every day for the past 17 years and then shared it on the internet, I've gone from questioning every millimeter of my skin and every personality quirk to having a helluva lot of respect for my body and way more grace for my self. I share the mindset for each piece above not to garner pity or compliments, but because I think many of us do this on a daily basis.

No matter the confidence we have, the therapy we've attended, the self-work we've completed, many of us still are focusing on proportion and figure flattery as we get dressed each morning. It's whispering to us as we pull a garment from a clothing rack at a store, considering clicking “buy” from a website. That whisper often has us choose a flattering silhouette in a meh color over a silhouette we've been told isn't flattering but is in a color of print that brings us joy. It's hard to let go of what has been ingrained in us since we were very young.

I purposefully break style rules to break the diet culture that has been fed to me since I was a toddler. Each time it forces me to see myself differently, less like something for others to admire and more for me to admire. And sometimes I wear outfits that embrace all kinds of rules purely because the outfit combination made me feel good on that day for whatever reason.

MLF11448 LiamSweater Coconut ALT 1 2 0f3d33c0 09ed 4e1e 813e e4d91c1220e9 1206x1506 crop center
The model on the M.M.LaFleur website wearing the same Liam Sweater and Senga Skirt I am wearing in these photos, also with white sneakers.

I don't know if that feeling good has to do with figure flattery and I don't really care to figure it out right now. But exercises like this, and the comments I get on blog posts and social media, it makes me realize that the internal dialog I have after all these years of working on my self image and confidence is one almost every woman, especially women around my age and older, has on a daily basis. And that we women are helping to create the image issues in others (and ourselves).

Let's Talk About Flattering as a Compliment

Let's start with using the word flattering as a compliment. This is a word I have received often in my years of sharing outfits, whether folks found my look to be flattering or not. Flattering is a term I used to use quite a lot myself to compliment others and to describe fashion trends and silhouettes here on Wardrobe Oxygen.

definition of flattering
The definition of flattering via Mirriam-Webster

Mirriam-Webster defines flattering as, “helping to enhance attractiveness.” We could write a whole thesis on that (who defines what is attractive, that a general idea for attractiveness is tied to the patriarchy and is problematic beyond that in regard to health, youth, size, race, skincolor, hair type and style, ability, etc.). There are plenty of think-pieces out there about this already, and a lot of you have told me you think word-shaming terms like flattering is taking political correctness too far.

Instead, I'd like to focus on how flattering is a term to help enhance. We use the word flattering but we don't explain what is being enhanced. Many have grown up having well-meaning (and not-so-well-meaning) folks use flattering to describe looks that make us look slimmer and more fitting with a proportional ideal than usual. Without an explanation as to why you are using the term flattering, it's hard for many of us to not immediately think of our size and shape.

The next time you want to compliment someone with the word flattering, consider using the word along with an explanation as to why you find that word the perfect compliment. Sharing the why helps illustrate your compliment and not have the receiver come to their own conclusions. That blue color is so flattering on you, it really makes your eyes pop. That dress is so flattering on you, it makes your butt look amazing. That print is so flattering on you, it really showcases your creative and colorful personality.

This exercise not only enhances your compliment, it helps you see when there may be a better word to use than flattering. And it may make you realize that sometimes when you're saying flattering, you really are meaning, “slimmer than usual” and may not want to be that person perpetuating diet culture and equating slim as most important.

Because the more thoughtful we are with the compliments we give others, the more thoughtful we are with the words we use for ourselves. Our weight does not determine our worth, our size does not determine our strength, and your life won't change by an outfit that makes you look a half inch slimmer or taller (but it may change if you wear what makes you happy).

over 40 style blog
Karl's shirt and shorts combo are French Connection, but he got it a few years ago.

As for this location, my husband and I had lunch at Pennyroyal Station, a New American restaurant in Mount Rainier, Maryland. This place is so beautiful; a small but airy restaurant and bar, a beautiful patio shaded by sailcloths, and a front lawn where we dined. It was our first time and won't be our last; everything we ordered was delicious and we were happy to find a nice selection of vegan and vegetarian offerings!

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In: Fall, Outfit Posts, Summer · Tagged: adidas, Brandon Blackwood, MM.LaFleur

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Comments

  1. The Better Fit says

    August 29, 2022 at 4:37 am

    You look so cute! This would be perfect for traveling. I love that it is a two-piece so I can hide my tummy

    Reply
  2. SusieG says

    August 25, 2022 at 1:50 pm

    Yes to all you wrote and shared. And double hell yeah to the outfit. You look fresh and happy. Love how you made it sporty 🙂

    Reply
  3. RoseAG says

    August 23, 2022 at 8:25 am

    That’s interesting that flattery has three definitions, and one of them contains the word ‘insincere.’ To me it’s a spin word and a little suspect.

    My hesitation about the belt bag and the sneakers with the sweater outfit is that I feel like it’s mixing modes. The bag and the sneakers are sporty, and while the sweater isn’t that dressy -it’s got a nubby texture- it’s not really sporty.

    Reply
  4. Dawn says

    August 20, 2022 at 10:38 pm

    Yes to all you wrote.

    Reply
  5. Payal says

    August 20, 2022 at 12:15 pm

    NGL the outfit looks better on you in the last pic than on the model. The belt bag is a trend that just needs to go away. As far as MMLF goes, they’ve always been overpriced but the quality of fabrics and designs have really deteriorated recently. And I was there customer for years

    Reply
  6. E says

    August 20, 2022 at 9:52 am

    I just love your thoughtful approach to fashion. Thank you for being the voice I need cheering me on as I celebrate my current figure rather than castigating myself for what I could or should look like.

    Reply
  7. Sadie says

    August 19, 2022 at 10:11 pm

    Posts like this are what make you a great fashion advisor for me – I see how someone who looks like me can take risks, have fun, and be current. And you look smashing in your take on this outfit, a real inspiration.

    Reply
  8. Jennifer says

    August 19, 2022 at 4:50 pm

    This was so good. Thank you!

    Reply
  9. Linda Hurst says

    August 19, 2022 at 3:43 pm

    THIS is why I started following you! I have always struggle with my weight and self image. At 61 I am the heaviest I have ever been and I am finally busting out those bright colors (you helped me embrace fuschia!) that make me happy! I love to be put together and am finally trying different styles that I thought I shouldn’t wear because of my age and weight. Time to banish those voices in my head and just be happy this body is still alive!

    Reply
    • FourInchHeels says

      August 23, 2022 at 5:07 am

      One thing that’s helped me over the years is repeating to myself “I do not owe the world beauty” (or an hourglass figure, or a flat belly, or long eyelashes, or whatever I am currently being mean to myself about). Being beautiful is not the rent I must pay to exist in this world. I deserve to wear shorts when it’s hot, I deserve to leave the house without makeup if I don’t feel like wearing it, I deserve to wear bright colors that draw attention if I choose.

      I’m so happy to hear that you’re embracing colors and styles that bring you joy. We all deserve to be this free! Celebrate the body that’s gotten you through 61 years, and I’m sure you look radiant when you wear fuchsia – when we wear something we love, it shows 🙂

      Reply
  10. AnnM in Ireland (sometimes KC) says

    August 19, 2022 at 3:39 pm

    As usual, you are the voice we all need to hear. Thank you. Very much.

    Reply
  11. Bonnie says

    August 19, 2022 at 3:03 pm

    I love this outfit and I think it looks amazing on you! Like seriously, it was made for you! I like it with the sneakers but actually love it more with the gold sandals – but it might be because in that photo I think the whole vibe you are giving off is confidence and sexiness and owning your own grown-ass self.

    Reply
    • Melissa says

      August 20, 2022 at 8:44 am

      Thank you, Allison. This was exactly what I needed to read this morning.

      Reply
  12. Diane langston says

    August 19, 2022 at 10:40 am

    Wow! Love this beautiful writing and your honest perspective. Thank you for all you do! ❤️

    Reply
  13. Shelly Cook says

    August 19, 2022 at 10:02 am

    You express yourself and ideas so we’ll! Thank you for another excellent post!

    Reply
  14. Gelinda says

    August 19, 2022 at 9:53 am

    Absolutely agree about how those voices from the past haunt us. I’m older than you and have to force myself to realize it’s okay to not match things up. Left to those voices in my head I’d be wearing matching hat, gloves, shoes and bag. And my clothes would be a single dark color, A-line, just over the knee at the top curve of the calf. I’d never wear a sleeve shorter than elbow length, or a flat shoe. Amazing how deeply planted the rules of our younger selves can be.

    Recently I managed a significant weight loss and was happy for a number of reasons, not least because I love clothes and now I have many more choices. I bought a dress I thought was adorable and wore it several times. Then I saw a photo of me in it with two friends significantly larger than I am (maybe 100 lbs.) and I looked to be the same size as them. My enjoyment of the dress was spoiled for that stupid, stupid reason. It is so hard to shake our history and what we’ve internalized regardless of what we know in our rational brains.

    I’m still short and curvy, at the very top of straight petite sizes, and trying hard to enjoy where I am and drown those voices. I appreciate the people here who know what it’s like.

    Reply
    • Shelly says

      August 19, 2022 at 10:05 am

      I empathize! I have a Tanya Taylor dress I adore, but don’t wear because it’s not “flattering.” It’s still in my closet because I love the colors and style.

      Reply
  15. Rebecca says

    August 19, 2022 at 9:50 am

    First, I love the sweater set! I have always loved sweater dresses and sets and you’ve given me the courage to try them again even though I have a prominent tummy. I just got a set I like from Club Monaco during the Nordstrom sale and I also got a great one from a Dutch company called Studio MYR. I’ve realized that if I order my true size and the top is cut the right way, these sets can be “flattering.”

    Ah yes—I admit, I have always linked flattering with “makes you look thinner” and for about the 5 minutes I spent trying to get an Instagram presence going (anyone who thinks bloggers don’t work hard is crazy!), it was geared toward looking thinner with a tummy. I realized pretty quickly I was out of step with the message of body acceptance and rejection of the diet culture. So I will try to incorporate more positive messages into my compliments and into my own self-view.

    Reply
  16. Susan Blakey says

    August 19, 2022 at 9:47 am

    I love this outfit on you, Alison, and YES! to redefining “flattering” away from the usual, narrow (pun intended) meaning. I had it drilled into me from a young age that outfits should always be “slimming,” and still struggle with this old mindset some days. There are SO many ways for an outfit to “flatter” the wearer.

    Reply
  17. Linda Peronto says

    August 19, 2022 at 9:26 am

    So many of your comments hit home with me. This sweater set, which I would never have tried on, looks amazing on your short curvy figure. I follow you regularly and see many looks I would try, if I had a bigger budget. But you do give me the nerve to try on things that don’t look like me!
    It seems like as we age, ideas that were thrown at us when we were young are hard to banish to the dungeons of our mind. And they truly lock us in to a stereotype of what we think we should or should not wear.
    You certainly area rule breaker, and I appreciate that.

    Reply
  18. Giuditta says

    August 19, 2022 at 9:04 am

    I WANT that sweater set — gorgeous!

    Reply
  19. Pip says

    August 19, 2022 at 8:34 am

    I noticed your mention of your beloved but well worn boots…try cowboy boots! Ridiculously comfortable, they come in every heel height, toe shape, calf width and color. While not appropriate for every outfit, they treat your feet with dignity and comfort. This 65 year old ranch girl loves every pair she owns (which is a bit embarrassing) and has nary a bunion, plantar fasciitis, nor callous. And, because of their strong leather construction (stick with the authentic cowboy brands, not fashion brands), your cobbler can stretch the calves to the point of comfort for you. As a bonus, I’ve been seeing them return to the fashion pages for fall 😉 Happy walking!

    Reply
    • Alison Gary says

      August 19, 2022 at 8:38 am

      I looove cowboy boots but I have yet to find a pair that accommodates a 20″ calf. A cobbler can stretch up to 1 cm (a bit more if not lined but cowboy boots are lined). If you know of any companies that make truly wide width cowboy boots I’d be down. I can’t even wear the short ankle-height versions because they’re usually too narrow because my calf muscle starts so low (I walked on my toes as a kid so my leg and ankle muscles are built up in atypical places).

      Reply
      • Pip says

        August 19, 2022 at 8:58 am

        Hmmm, I have 18+ inch calves and can comfortably fit in Ariat wide calves (without stretching) for everyday wear and Lucchese for splurge/fancy days, with stretching. I’ve had the Lucchese stretched with great success. I hope that this gives you a starting point! Thanks for the great writing and inspiration!

        Reply
  20. Leila says

    August 19, 2022 at 7:44 am

    Your content is so ON-POINT lately. Have read your blog for over ten years, and appreciate how your voice has continued to be strong and insightful. Thought-provoking, relevant and I especially look forward to Weekend Reads.

    Reply
    • Alison Gary says

      August 19, 2022 at 8:38 am

      Thank you, Leila!

      Reply
    • Karmen says

      August 19, 2022 at 9:13 am

      Totally agree, you’re inspirational, not aspirational and I love that you’re using your voice to uplift. My favourite blog for sure.

      Reply

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How to Style The Leather Trend for Fall When You’re a Grown Woman

Since 2005, Wardrobe Oxygen has offered real-life style advice for grown-ass women. With years of experience as an apparel visual merchandiser and personal shopper, Alison Gary provides advice on how to achieve personal style no matter your age, size, or budget.

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Dec 5

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The tree is trimmed! 🎄

When I was a single gal, I had the prettiest tree with a color story and theme. 20 years later, my tree is a hodgepodge of inherited ornaments, gifts from loved ones, and handmade pieces from both my childhood and by my child. And I think each year it veers further from the original concept the more beautiful it becomes!

My daughter and I donned our Santa hats, turned on the holiday playlist, a Yule log on the TV, and spent the afternoon getting our home into the Christmas spirit.

When she was little, my husband would pick her up so she could place the star on top of the tree. Now that she’s taller than I am, when he got home he just put his arm around her as she used the library stool to reach the top. Some traditions need to be modified with time but they’re still special! ⭐️

Top is a feather trimmed Breton from @talbotsofficial; the scarf as a belt is also Talbots but a few years old. The jeans are @landsend and the blanket on the chair in the second photo is by artist  @zanderschlacter

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Nov 28

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Just got back from a 4-night getaway with my sister @debbiefaye78 at @curacaomarriottbeachresort. It was a last-minute planned trip that ended up being perfect. We weren’t ready to celebrate Thanksgiving without our mom and this escape what just what our hearts needed. 

I’ll be sharing more once I finally unpack my suitcase and organize my photos and thoughts; but I couldn’t not share this picture from yesterday morning. Debbie and I got up early to enjoy some of the day at the resort before flying home to DC. We had the infinity pool to ourselves, finished our books, and relaxed before a long day of travel. 🌴

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Nov 19

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Working on the weekend is far more enjoyable when it’s in my office 💚

Perimenopause and the pandemic and homeschooling made our row home feel even smaller. So when neighbors revitalized an office building in our town center and offered individual offices for rent, I felt it would be good for business and personally. And I kept it when the world opened up and our kid went back to public school because it helps me have a clear start and end to the work day, but also because I created a space I really enjoy.

This weekend I went to the office to shoot some content. And once I was finished I enjoyed just sitting here, watching the light change. I think I may switch the furniture around, switch up the energy. I love that I can do that without consulting another or having another person’s opinions matter.

When you have a family, things go from me to we. I don’t regret leaving Corporate America to do this full time, but I do miss being part of a team. And I missed having an office, a place away from home that’s just for me. 

I wish more communities would offer rental offices like @thegranitebuilding. With reasonably affordable monthly rates, it doesn’t have to just be business owners who get office spaces. It can be a place to work on a hobby or craft, a place to WFH that’s not home, or a place to just read and write and nap undisturbed. A literal room of one’s own. Because sometimes a person needs time to be a me and not a we. 💚

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Nov 17

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You’re never too old for a Rory Gilmore sweater… this cotton fisherman sweater is from @llbean and inspired by @marielle.elizabeth I shopped the men’s department for a better size range. The influencer influenced the influencer!

The jeans are @landsend I got last year and I’m glad they brought them back this year in several washes, inseam lengths, and plus sizes. If in doubt, size down. They will shrink in length slightly but not anywhere else, they’re super comfy and stretchy but don’t stretch out. 

Kept the collegiate vibe going with a trucker cap, HOKAs, and my trusty commuter bag for years: the large @dagnedover Dakota backpack!

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
https://liketk.it/4o4bQ #ltkmidsize #midsizestyle #genxstyle #ltkover40 #over40style

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Nov 15

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My husband has a special backpack he fills with weight to wear while hiking; it’s called rucking. I wear a @dagnedover Dakota and fill it with my laptop, my iPad, a full water bottle, and my purse and walk to work; it’s called commuting. 💁🏻‍♀️

But seriously, I’ve had this backpack for five years. It has been shoved under plane seats, in overstuffed car trunks, under feet in the passenger seat. I’ve worn it as I’ve walked miles in major cities and from my house to my town center. My daughter also has a Dagne Dakota; it survived middle school and continues to work through camping, sleepovers, and road trips. It’s genially designed, comfortable, and can take a beating and still look great.

As for the rest of the look, the vest (XL) is a new purchase from @athleta; the Rainier tights (L) are also Athleta but two years old. The purple top is @nike and about a decade old. Hat is @llbean and it’s on sale for less than $15. And my trusty @hoka sneakers that have had their own set of adventures.

Follow my shop @wardrobe_oxygen on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!
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#ltkmidsize #ltkover40 #genxstyle #dagnedoverdakota

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Nov 6

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Another day of early voting for our city election, another outfit I wore as an election judge! 🗳️

I got this sweater set from @mmlafleur last spring and it continues to be a favorite. The color and popcorn stitch makes it wearable three seasons of the year. I’ve styled it with gold heels and dramatic gold earrings, with sneakers and a crossbody belt bag, and more than once with knee-high boots and a scarf at my throat. The color works with brown and black boots, the skirt silhouette and length with heels and flats. These brown riding boots are from @duoboots and almost a decade old. The scarf belonged to my dad; I have a feeling it was styled with a leisure suit back in the day!

I may have been more dressed up than other election judges but I think seeing democracy in action is a cause to celebrate! 🇺🇸

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Nov 4

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Early voting poll worker style 🗳️

I’ve been an election judge (AKA poll worker) for several years but this year I decided to take it a step further and join my city’s Board of Elections. I’m passionate about fair and accessible elections for all. The Board is acting as election judges for early voting so it’s great to use my previous experience on a city level!

I believe voting is a special occasion and I dressed the part. The puff sleeve sweater and pants are from @anntaylor; these pants are the same ones from the suit I wore earlier this week. I added a beloved @hermes scarf as a belt and silver hoops (they belonged to my mom) as a hint of shine.

If your area is having an election this coming week; I implore you to vote. Your voice deserves to be heard. And please ensure your neighbors know of the election and where to vote. 🇺🇸

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Nov 2

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Always fun to see my name in lights! 💡 I was a panelist at the annual @jaofcentralmd Leading Ladies event that connects local high schoolers with women in business. My panel was on using social media for promoting one’s business or personal brand. Along with other social media experts, we guided students and adults on how to create compelling and engaging social content and together created content for the conference’s feed. It was fun and I loved being able to share my almost two decades of personal and professional experience!

The dress code for the conference was business professional and since the event’s theme color was pink, they encouraged us to wear the color. 

This @anntaylor suit has been a favorite since late summer. I’ve dressed it down with a white tank and sneakers and glammed it up with a silk cami and gold heeled sandals. I love how Ann Taylor has petite suiting up to size 16; I know I’m not the only short curvy girl who desires suits and professional attire!

For this event I chose a berry-colored microfiber tank from @lovechicos. I own several of these tanks; they wear like iron and the tight weave and subtle shine make them great shells under suits. 

The look fit the theme but was also comfortable. I was glad to share my expertise and encourage others to see how they can donate their time and knowledge to a local @juniorachievementusa #JALeadingLadies #JALeadingLadies2023 #JACMD #JuniorAchievment

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Oct 18

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Sharing this from my #iPadOS17 thanks to @apple! A bit belated with all that has been going on lately but I’m really enjoying using an iPad to improve how I work, stay organized, and find new ways to be creative. Can I just say that editing video on an iPad instead of a phone is a game changer!

Recently, I attended an event at the gorgeous Apple Carnegie Library hosted by @flourishplanner_ to learn ways to make the most of #iOS17 and it was awesome. I brought my new iPad and learned about the new wallpaper, stickers, and organizing tools.

As for my look, the dress is from @bananarepublic’s summer collection. Kept it comfy with a pair of Samba sneakers and held down the volume of the dress with my black recycled leather @ganni crossbody. Added an old @_jennybird link necklace and a silver cuff I’ve had since the ‘90s.

#todayatapple #genxstyle #midsizestyle #midsizefashion #size14 #over40style

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Oct 17

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I love an excuse to dress up, especially if it’s for a good cause! This weekend was the @thenewdealcafe Masquer-AID fundraiser to support this independent cafe, art gallery, and live music venue in @cityofgreenbelt.

My family and I have loved going to The New Deal Cafe for all these years. Grabbing coffee with friends, having a meal, seeing an amazing band, participating in an open mic or one of their Reel and Meal events. So @debbiefaye78, our mom, and I got tickets and even chipped in for a plaque from us “Ashpes Girls.” 

Our mom passed before she could attend the event; we asked our like a sister best friend @shellymingram to join us in her place and we had a great time, dancing all night as our mom would have, connecting with neighbors, and supporting a local business we all love so much.

As for the outfit, the dress is @ronnykobo the bag is @ganni and I borrowed both from @renttherunway The shoes I’ve had for years and the gold metal mask I found on Amazon and liked how it could mold to my face and not put pressure on my still-healing eye.

And I know y’all will ask because I received so many DMs this weekend when I shared this event in my Stories… my sister’s dress is from @eshakti she bought it a few years ago and it’s even more gorgeous in person!

#newdealcafe #greenbeltisgreat #onlyingreenbelt #midsizestyle #genxstyle #over40style #greenbeltmd

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